The 3rd tumor was benign (thank God!) and the liver cysts are nothing to worry about. So I have a lumpectomy and lymph node removal scheduled for September 16th. I actually go home the same day. There will be 3 to 4 weeks of recovery during which I'm not allowed to work. Thereafter I will have 4 - 5 months of chemotherapy and then radiation for 5 weeks. If all goes smoothly and they manage to get all of the cancer, I should be ok by next April or so.
It's going to be a bumpy, unpleasant ride but at least I know where I'm going.
Thanks to all for the prayers and good thoughts! Thanks to everyone for putting me on your various prayer lists. Please keep them coming - it really helps and gives me peace of mind!
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Monday, August 30, 2010
Big Day Tomorrow
Tomorrow I have pre-surgery testing (blood work, EKG, chest X-ray) and then the meeting with the surgeon (Dr. Gemignani) where ALL will be revealed. She should have the results of all my various tests and should be able to advise whether a lumpectomy is still an option or whether I will need to resign myself to a mastectomy. I just want to KNOW!
I will do whatever I need to do to move on with my life. Just tell me and I will spring into action. This waiting business is more than annoying.
I will do whatever I need to do to move on with my life. Just tell me and I will spring into action. This waiting business is more than annoying.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
2 Week Anniversary - How it all started
Many people have asked how I found out about this. Well, here's the history:
Mid-June or so I had pain on the left side pre-period (sorry if this is TMI for the men reading). However, it disappeared so I thought it was "just a swollen gland". Some friends confirmed that this was possible. The next month it happened again but a little more severe and it didn't go away as fast, plus the "swollen gland" was still there. I was due for a ob/gyn appointment anyway and I knew Dr. Zilberstein (who delivered both Max and Leo but who also is very blunt and has a terrible bed-side manner) would yell at me that I hadn't had a mammogram yet. So I quickly scheduled a mammogram before my appointment with Dr. Z and pointed out that I had felt a lump.
Day after mammogram they call me and tell me I should have an ultrasound. So I schedule it for the following week. I have the ultrasound. They tell me I should have a biopsy ASAP and if the schedulers tell me that the radiologist is fully booked for the week I should tell them to call him. Hm. Sounds serious. So that's what I do and I'm booked for a biopsy THE NEXT DAY.
Have biopsy, still thinking it might be a cyst. The radiologist tells me he thinks its a "tumor". I say, "OK, a tumor. Could it be benign?" He says, yes, but probably not. He's pretty sure it's cancer as he's seen enough of these and he doesn't want to lie to me. He suggests I start looking for a surgeon. WTF??? I leave, stand in the middle of 77th street, start bawling and call David, my mom, my sister, Lilly, etc. The doorman of the building I'm in front of goes in and out, in and out, never says anything. Typical New York.
That was Weds. (8/11), the worst of it. I get used to the idea that I may have cancer and Friday (8/13), on the way to work, the radiologist calls me and tells me that he was right. I have breast cancer. By then I'm calm. I am numb but not surprised. I'm glad he told me on Wednesday. I am prepared for the fight. That was two weeks ago. I can't believe everything that has happened since....
Mid-June or so I had pain on the left side pre-period (sorry if this is TMI for the men reading). However, it disappeared so I thought it was "just a swollen gland". Some friends confirmed that this was possible. The next month it happened again but a little more severe and it didn't go away as fast, plus the "swollen gland" was still there. I was due for a ob/gyn appointment anyway and I knew Dr. Zilberstein (who delivered both Max and Leo but who also is very blunt and has a terrible bed-side manner) would yell at me that I hadn't had a mammogram yet. So I quickly scheduled a mammogram before my appointment with Dr. Z and pointed out that I had felt a lump.
Day after mammogram they call me and tell me I should have an ultrasound. So I schedule it for the following week. I have the ultrasound. They tell me I should have a biopsy ASAP and if the schedulers tell me that the radiologist is fully booked for the week I should tell them to call him. Hm. Sounds serious. So that's what I do and I'm booked for a biopsy THE NEXT DAY.
Have biopsy, still thinking it might be a cyst. The radiologist tells me he thinks its a "tumor". I say, "OK, a tumor. Could it be benign?" He says, yes, but probably not. He's pretty sure it's cancer as he's seen enough of these and he doesn't want to lie to me. He suggests I start looking for a surgeon. WTF??? I leave, stand in the middle of 77th street, start bawling and call David, my mom, my sister, Lilly, etc. The doorman of the building I'm in front of goes in and out, in and out, never says anything. Typical New York.
That was Weds. (8/11), the worst of it. I get used to the idea that I may have cancer and Friday (8/13), on the way to work, the radiologist calls me and tells me that he was right. I have breast cancer. By then I'm calm. I am numb but not surprised. I'm glad he told me on Wednesday. I am prepared for the fight. That was two weeks ago. I can't believe everything that has happened since....
Survived the MRI-guided biopsy - Just Barely
The CAT scan of liver cysts was on Thurs. That was fine. I'm not concerned b/c I've known about these cysts for a few years, saw a specialists, and was told it was nothing to worry about. Very common. But of course, Sloan Kettering is not going to take my word for it so it had to be checked out. If something comes of it, I will be surprised.
The MRI-guided biopsy on Friday, however, was utter hell. I told them the last biopsy hurt horribly and they said, "Well, did you have it here? It won't hurt." Turns out I don't react well to the anesthetic that they use - it felt like a million needles were jabbing me before they even jabbed me with a needle! 45 minutes later and I was a total wreck! I will spare you the details except for the fact that I proclaimed loudly that "this is exactly what I wanted to avoid!" And then I started shaking uncontrollably and crying. Oh, and then they made me do another mammogram. Yahoo!
Adding to all of that, there were about 20 doctors or so observing the MRI. That freaked me out, thinking "OMG! I must be a really serious case!" Turns out they were physicians from other countries learning how to do the latest MRI biopsies. Some introduced themselves - they were from Italy and Australia. Glad I could be of some use, I guess.
Afterwards I was a total freak but managed to visit the "boutique" where they sell everything breast cancer-related. I bought 2 "bras" to sleep in (as per doctor's orders) which they just directly billed to my insurance. They had a decent selection of wigs and other paraphenalia. OMG - I can't believe I now live in the breast cancer world. I was actually excited to see what all they had because I have no idea on where to find wigs, etc. Not that I think I'm a wig person - I actually don't think I am. But Max requested that I wear a wig to his yet-to-be scheduled soccer games. We will see.
The MRI-guided biopsy on Friday, however, was utter hell. I told them the last biopsy hurt horribly and they said, "Well, did you have it here? It won't hurt." Turns out I don't react well to the anesthetic that they use - it felt like a million needles were jabbing me before they even jabbed me with a needle! 45 minutes later and I was a total wreck! I will spare you the details except for the fact that I proclaimed loudly that "this is exactly what I wanted to avoid!" And then I started shaking uncontrollably and crying. Oh, and then they made me do another mammogram. Yahoo!
Adding to all of that, there were about 20 doctors or so observing the MRI. That freaked me out, thinking "OMG! I must be a really serious case!" Turns out they were physicians from other countries learning how to do the latest MRI biopsies. Some introduced themselves - they were from Italy and Australia. Glad I could be of some use, I guess.
Afterwards I was a total freak but managed to visit the "boutique" where they sell everything breast cancer-related. I bought 2 "bras" to sleep in (as per doctor's orders) which they just directly billed to my insurance. They had a decent selection of wigs and other paraphenalia. OMG - I can't believe I now live in the breast cancer world. I was actually excited to see what all they had because I have no idea on where to find wigs, etc. Not that I think I'm a wig person - I actually don't think I am. But Max requested that I wear a wig to his yet-to-be scheduled soccer games. We will see.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Appts. Update
Many people have asked: the CAT scan is Thursday (8/26) at 3:20 pm and the MRI biopsy is Friday (8/27) at 8:30 am. David is going with me to the MRI because I'm expecting it to be horrible!
Thank you so much for all the emails and calls! It makes me feel so much better that I have so many people rooting for me!
Thank you so much for all the emails and calls! It makes me feel so much better that I have so many people rooting for me!
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Now more bad news...
Well, the results of the various tests are in and they want me in for an MRI-guided biopsy of the small tumor and a CAT scan because they "happened to see" cysts on my liver at the bottom of the last MRI.
The last 2 biopsies hurt badly and I'm still bruised and swollen from them. I'm not looking forward to another one. This is so depressing! I don't know how I'm managing to hold up...
The last 2 biopsies hurt badly and I'm still bruised and swollen from them. I'm not looking forward to another one. This is so depressing! I don't know how I'm managing to hold up...
Tiny Bit of Good News
I received a call from one of the doctors telling me that I tested NEGATIVE for the breast cancer gene. This means no "automatic" double mastectomy! Fabulous! Back to looking forward to a lumpectomy and radiation....
Gross Details
You all know how squeamish I am and how much I hate needles, blood, "anything that causes pain" and hospitals in general. I guess I need to get over that. Anyway, here is where things now stand:
One large tumor on the left side and one large tumor in a lymph node in the same area. Yesterday during the MRI they found a possible third tumor (which is very small).
I will likely have surgery (a lumpectomy) mid-September, then 5 weeks of radiation (once per day), then 5 months of chemotherapy (once per week, every other week).
However, I'm waiting to hear back on the full results of the MRI from yesterday. It's possible I might need to go in for an MRI-guided biopsy for the small tumor and/or have chemo before the surgery.
This has all happened so fast! Unbelievable.
One large tumor on the left side and one large tumor in a lymph node in the same area. Yesterday during the MRI they found a possible third tumor (which is very small).
I will likely have surgery (a lumpectomy) mid-September, then 5 weeks of radiation (once per day), then 5 months of chemotherapy (once per week, every other week).
However, I'm waiting to hear back on the full results of the MRI from yesterday. It's possible I might need to go in for an MRI-guided biopsy for the small tumor and/or have chemo before the surgery.
This has all happened so fast! Unbelievable.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Heidi's First Post
This is Heidi's new blog to keep friends and family up to date on her newest challenge: surviving breast cancer! No question, this cancer won't know what hit it! With great doctors, a wonderful family and supportive friends, Heidi is in the best possible position to run - not walk - down the road to recovery. Check back for updates on the latest.
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